A little comic relief- best I ever heard

[Willie makit]

We've all had our experiences with folks, quitting on us, backing out or just plain ole "no shows". A recent post stating someone's "rabbit was sick" made me chuckle.

Although I know it usually is not funny to us at the time, all we can really do is laugh it off and put that feller in the "no fly" list.
I'd like to hear some of the most believable "or not so believable" stories for why your hunting/fishing buddy has slighted you.

One person I invite regularly just to see what else he can come up with, even though I know why. He's the guy that's way too much the man to admit the truth, his wife said no. Lol I've threatened to create a personal "top ten" t shirt of why he can't go, just to wear in front of his wife.

Although I'm no story teller and the only one I recall right now (my co-worker )-

Monday: I'm going spearfishing this weekend leaving Friday back Sunday , you want to go josh?
Josh: heck yeah, I'm in,

Friday at work: Ok, Josh I'm loaded up ready to go. Josh: sorry man. Can't go "I gotta mow this weekend"
Me: dang who's yard you got to mow?
Josh : "just mine"

I respected his deer in the headlight look and knew he really didn't want me to ask other questions. As I know where he lives.

[Indian Summer]

This isn't one about a buddies excuse but instead his wife's " 999 really good reasons" why he can't go anywhere. Mind you this chic is miserable and anything that makes him happy just pisses her off.

I invited him go turkey hunting which you all know means a really early start. At 4 am he calls and says he can't go. His wife just now told him he has to babysit the kids. You would think she might mention that the night before but that might give him a chance to figure something out to make it work right. I said oh yeah what if I can find a babysitter for you? He says heck yeah if you can cover me I'll tell the b#t*h I'm going. Even though I live 45 minutes away my mother lives 1 block from him... and she's up with the chickens & really likes his kids.

So he asks her "honey I know it's not likely at this hour but if I can find a sitter can I go?" She's thinking he'll never find one so she says yeah and good luck with that in her Wicked Witch of the West tone.

I call my mom... who answers on the first ring. ha ha She's says no problem I'd love to. So I call him back and say I got you covered and you can drop them right now or your wife can drop them later if she prefers. So he gives her the "good news" and she is livid. She finally broke down and says I don't care if you find ten sitters and give me a thousand dollars to go shopping you're not going hunting. So he gives in and doesn't hunt but at least I made her admit the truth which was that she's just a miserable pain in the a$$. Mission accomplished.

A once read short novel called 100 Miles to the Outhouse by Willie Makit. Illustrated by Betty Don't. I think that every time I see your name.

Off season threads, gotta love em.

[JimKirk]

not a can't go but i had a friend that rode with me 20+ miles every weekend each way as we were doing alot of day trips since we both had small children. I had the truck so I drove. after about the 12th time of driving i said hey how about chipping in for gas to which he says sure, how about 10$. i just chalked it up as I'd be going by myself anyway.
never an argument with the spouse since I don't have one. now if i just didn't have to deal with the J.O.B i'd have all the time in the world.

[Lark Bunting]

This isn't one about a buddies excuse but instead his wife's " 999 really good reasons" why he can't go anywhere. Mind you this chic is miserable and anything that makes him happy just pisses her off.

I invited him go turkey hunting which you all know means a really early start. At 4 am he calls and says he can't go. His wife just now told him he has to babysit the kids. You would think she might mention that the night before but that might give him a chance to figure something out to make it work right. I said oh yeah what if I can find a babysitter for you? He says heck yeah if you can cover me I'll tell the b#t*h I'm going. Even though I live 45 minutes away my mother lives 1 block from him... and she's up with the chickens & really likes his kids.

So he asks her "honey I know it's not likely at this hour but if I can find a sitter can I go?" She's thinking he'll never find one so she says yeah and good luck with that in her Wicked Witch of the West tone.

I call my mom... who answers on the first ring. ha ha She's says no problem I'd love to. So I call him back and say I got you covered and you can drop them right now or your wife can drop them later if she prefers. So he gives her the "good news" and she is livid. She finally broke down and says I don't care if you find ten sitters and give me a thousand dollars to go shopping you're not going hunting. So he gives in and doesn't hunt but at least I made her admit the truth which was that she's just a miserable pain in the a$$. Mission accomplished.

A once read short novel called 100 Miles to the Outhouse by Willie Makit. Illustrated by Betty Don't. I think that every time I see your name.

Off season threads, gotta love em.

I am married to one of those. Haha...

[Lefty]

I had a guy I hunted with off and on . He often had lame excuses.
He thought he was some sort of time management wizard, but was far from it. Looking for his boots when we should be leaving. One time I went over to pick him up at the assigned time. The wind was screaming, blowing snow. I reminded him I put 100 mallards to bed the night before. Then said should I wake him when I had my birds,. he laughed. Twenety minutes later I rang the door bell with 6 drake mallards

A fellow I worked with wanted to hunt with us; My buddy reminded him I "leave" on time and to be on-time. Were having a fast and furious time killing birds when he pulled up to the boat ramp,..
Sorry nothing for the T-shirt that I can think of. Oh maybe "I was just a few minutes late"

[JJ Overkill]

I had a hunting buddy once and he had a wife that wanted to kill me, LITERALLY!!!!!! I would "steal" her husband and take him out duck hunting. after a few trips he started coming up with reason why he couldn't go, best one was, I cant go my wifes says your a bad influence on me, I asked how??? I was taking him away from his son and I didn't care about mine because I am always out hunting. it took my wife some time to calm me down after that one. I wanted to let her know what I thought of her.

we tipped our boat one morning out hunting, when he told her she said, to bad he made it back. I just smiled and shot her the bird.

his most often used excuse was I have to watch the kid, my wife has a headache. i stopped hunting with him after that season.

[LckyTylr]

Some of you guys and your friends have AWFUL Wives!

I wish I could remember the excuses that I have heard from buddies through college. Most of my buddies had hunted various species and styles through their high school years, but few had Archery Elk, Backpack hunted. I'd ask them if they wanted to go hunting . . . take the bait. Sure, sounds fun. Then I'd explain to them how I hunted. Food and camp on back, hike a ways from the nearest road or trail, hunt up and hunt down, quit when the sun gives up. Sounds Interesting . . . I'd ask them Thursday before we are supposed to leave if they have all of their gear in order for the 3-day trip. Ughhh . . . I'm not going to be able to make it . . .

I should have been writing them down. The funniest ones were when they'd say things like "I've got a big paper due on Monday". Oh yeah, dipsh!t . . . I'm in all of the same classes as you and we don't have ANY papers due this semester!

[Z Barebow]

I guess I don't have any nightmare stories. I hunt by myself most of the time. Only people I hunt with are like minded and when we set a date/time, it is solid.

I have a saying for making an appointed date/time. "I wait for no man,,, and very few women."

[Mav]

I'm still in college and I've already given up trying to find a hunting buddy. The only ones I've found that I can count on are my dad, brother, and although she's only been scouting so far, my wife. "Hunting buddies" in the past most often just never showed and gave an excuse later. Usually of " oh man was that this weekend"? After several reminders up to a day before we are to meet. I've also had two that I had met only a handful of times ask to go hunting with me that never showed and then afterwards never answered my calls or anything else. People can sure amaze sometimes.

[ishy]

I have "one of those" wives but only at selective times. Riddle me this, the last week of archery this year I have tues-sat off. Tues night she informs me that the girls (we have three 4,7, and 9) have had a hard time with me being gone so much already this year. Mind you I hadn't hunted any weekends trying to be with the family while they are in school. So wed morning I stay home and help get the kids off to school help at home etc. Got to my wallow at 330 only to see a seven point had been there an hour earlier, and a little six earlier (this was by far the best day all year at the wallow, and really has absolutley nothing to do with my gripe). So I hunt wed-fri afternoon. Friday night weather goes south which I don't mind except winds at 25mph and gusts to 40. So I tell her friday night I'm staying home saturday to be with the family. She wakes up at 430 am saturday and nudges me ,"It's not raining. I have a feeling you'll get an elk if you go." So in just a few days she went from you shouldn't go to you should. I think she suffers from "ifitsmyideaitsokitis".

[Willie makit]

Two questions.

1. Did you go?

2. What did it cost you either way? Lol

Three girls, wow! Spend all the time you can with them, another 2-3 years your going to start getting dumber, your hair will begin to turn gray or turn loose. Done my tour of duty with girls. Good luck, best wishes, your severely outnumbered bud.

Don't fear "ifitsmyideaitsokitis" is not a rare condition as my wife, sister and even my boss all has it too.